SQUIRRELS ARE NASTY CREATURES

Yes, squirrels are nasty creatures - I don't care how cute you think they are. I'm a mad gardener (mad as in "lots", not "angry"). At this time of year, I'm in vigilante mode, trying to protect my corn from the ravages of our neighborhhod terrorists - the squirrels who hang and wait on the telephone wires and poles until my trusty critter-chasing dog Belle is in the house. The nasty varmints then make a beeline towards my garden and jump in, gorging themselves on everything I've grown. Last year, they literally shredded a dozen ears of corn in one night - peeled them right on the stalk and ate the kernels (I had the inspiration then to set up a motion controlled squirrel bazooka, but it didn't work out..). And you should see them sitting on top of the sunflowers, consuming nuts all the live-long day. These are the healthiest squirrels on the planet, no doubt.
Now you're probably saying, "Todd, why not just shoot them?". Don't believe for a minute that the thought doesn't cross my mind every minute of the day. But as we live within city limits, my wife has forbidden me from sitting at the window and taking aim 24/7, even with a lowly BB Gun. She's afraid that between my bad eyesight and the squirrels' blinding speed, I'll only hit the neighbors' windows. And they're too smart for trapping, to be sure.
So next time you see a squirrel and say "aww, how cute!" - remember that they are actually nasty little rodents, not far removed from the proverbial RAT. Gardeners unite! If someone invented an EFFECTIVE squirrel deterrent, they'd make BILLIONS!